Sunday, November 30, 2008

What are you thankful for?

So I keep asking myself this question, "what are you thankful for?" I am not sure how to really answer that...I mean I am thankful for the usual things like my family, friends, home, etc... but really I have to dig deep to think about the things that I am grateful for and have meaning to me. For me this year has been a personal struggle to find happiness and joy in the things that I do for myself. I have been a wife, mother, daughter, friend for so long but what am I to me. I have found that this year I am strong, independent, faithful, kind, funny, caring and so much more. This year has been a year of discovery for me, about myself and my values...some things I have learned have been both good and bad. Like I love to shop and am really angry that the economy has taken a change and that I don't have the money like I use to, so I can't shop like I use to! Can't believe that I am so materialistic...that is not my strong point. I have also learned that through my job changing I am a much happier person. Who would have thought I was unhappy, until I did something to make me really happy. I have also found that doing things for myself makes me happy too...of course my family is missing my time spent with them and for that I feel a little guilt, but not enough for me to stop doing some "me things". I have found that I have a bad attitude to my family when things don't go my way...not a shining moment for me!!! I guess I am a pouter. I think that makes me the saddest to realize that I take out my feelings on other people who I love so much. It makes me feel sad for them, because my actions are making other people feel bad! For that I am sorry. I have learned that I am a giver, I love to see the expression on someone's face when I do something for them, my heart overflows! I am strong, when my family has been faced with obstacles like illness, I have overcome them. I have also learned to say no, many of you would say that is not true, but I have really done things this year that I want to do and given up so many other things...I know I am still busy and sometimes overwhelmed but far less than in years past.
Of course I am so thankful that I have been able to take this year and truly open my eyes to everything around me and learn! Sometimes it is so good for your soul to reflect on your life and have a renewed look. I know that I will go into the next year with a different perspective and that every moment is for me to learn something new.

1 comment:

Kim said...

Good post. I understand the struggles well.